chika chika Dave Stri-derr

[Dave Strider]

dave strider
m/14/ny

The 'NY' has been just a recent development that he has needed to adjust to when ironically responding to requests for his age, sex, and location, as it would so happen. Unfortunately, his older bro's reasoning for moving from Houston to New York still hasn't entirely sunk in, though Dave has accepted the decision. It cannot be anything but, after all, irony in its finest and most powerful form to move into an even shittier apartment to film more disturbing erotic fantasies about plush puppet ass in the big apple.

Besides, more clubs in New York squared. That would mean more places for the youngest Strider to start spinning his sick beats like the finest of ambrosia while the ladies out on the floor get low... well, when the fake IDs actually starts becoming a bit more believable to the bouncers, anyway. Last time they couldn't keep their hands off him; they compared his pale skin tone to him on the card, messed up his whitish-blonde hair, got freaked out by his pinkish red eyes behind the shades, chaos everywhere, virgins screaming and holding their bosoms in the street... The usual, you know. Comes with being too beautiful for the world to handle you.

A Strider is too cool to be phased by something like that. A Strider is too cool to be phased by anything- Dave has near perfected his poker face to remain on in any situation. It definitely doesn't slip when he's surprised or frustrated, or when he's amused, or at any other time. Luckily, Bro never sees that- he'd take that as weakness. A Strider is never weak; else sword strife more than once on the rooftops per week starts happening. And when yesterday's wounds aren't given time to heal, they're really going to feel like shit by the end of it all.

... Though he's never really sure WHY he needs to train. Well, maybe it'll help avoid confrontations with older students at school, or make it easier to get a dead bird off your neighbor's windowsill to properly preserve in a jar, though really... It's probably just to be ironic. Yeah, maybe he did justify a lot of things that way, though sometimes, it was the best word to explain it. Outsiders simply can't grasp that.

Not that there hasn't been supplementary efforts to help them. Dave runs numerous blogs, and even writes a meaningfully shitty comic strip chock full of ironic goodness for the entertainment of others. But that isn't all- Mr. Strider is also a skilled mixer of phat beats, the sick fires of his raps exploding out of control like a car without tires. When not blowing minds and being without doubt deserving of at least ten Nobel prizes, he also enjoys video games, be they of dubious quality or not.

his quirk all but kicks grammar to the curb because there aint nobody who has time for that shit... with a few exceptions
though if were going to talk about exceptions in here then were going to get into some run on sentences all up in this example because sometimes you just have a lot to say that you cant say if youre limited by punctuation
stick it to the man dont let no periods stop you from saying what youre going to say because they have no fucking right
if they say no just kick them in the face all freedom of expression

bitch

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We interrupt this app to bring you a quick and unrelated role play sample;

There was perhaps some truth to the proposal that he had just been more than a tad brash in his previous choice of action, but Jake English couldn't have said he really regretted it. Well, at least not without lying anyway, though he had no intention of adding to his list of transgressions that had landed him in the cargo hold of the ship he was presently sitting in. As much of a cad as he had been within the past twenty-four hours (more or less, he had lost track of time in here), he still had some semblance of honor, and had deftly sworn to pay these men he had shamelessly stolen a ride from from back someday.

He didn't, after all, have much choice in the matter otherwise. His grandmother's Pokemon, noble as they were, were getting on in years. It would be cruel to push them to bring him to the mainland to leave them to return on their lonesome! Besides, this was HIS adventure. His and Beretta's that was- he had opted to keep his Squirtle in her Pokeball in order to maximize his nonexistent stealth capabilities after pleading with the captain for a ride with not a single Poke' in his pockets had failed. To his fortune, one of the crewmen's Machoke had been willing to take a bribe consisting of half of his lunch in exchange for getting them on board. He and Beretta had needed to ration their portions carefully ever since, but it was worth it. The call to adventure was simply too powerful to refuse!

... Alright, he would admit that his previous excitement had flagged since then, overtaken by the dank salty stench of the hold and his perpetual hunger that wouldn't quite go away. He tried to think of it as being just another challenge, though even that had been in vain as hour after dark hour passed, his solar-powered skulltop having been long drained of its power reserves.
His drive had been rekindled, however, as the boat lurched to a stop in a motion that had nearly knocked him off the crate he'd been dozing on. With the only windows to look out of far out of his reach, Jake used what little light he was provided to gather his things in preparation to leave.

... However he was going to do that. As the lights in the hold came on again, Jake blinked and squinted, dazed, though quickly came to the realization of what he was working with as one of the crewmen he'd been hiding from on earlier on in this venture clanked down the stairs. Swift as he dared, Jake removed his boots and slipped down the opposite side of the crate, making less noise in his sock feet against the metal floor as he crept between the walls of metal cargo. Easy, easy....

"Oi now! Water you doin' here?"

Jake's breath hitched as the familiar release of a Pokeball echoed through the chamber, revealing the Machoke from earlier as the man tried to approach... only to be held back by his own Pokemon. A wide smile flashed over the young man's face.

"Thanks again chap!" He called over his shoulder to the fighting type as he ran, tugging his boots on as the man yelled for the boy to stop and that there had been a stowaway on board. Jake wasted no time in getting the blazes out of there, going so far as to dive at the two crew members who tried to stop him at the top of the stairs with a war cry of "HYAAAAAAAAAAH!", catching them off guard and knocking them down. Breathless but pushed on by adrenaline, he rolled himself off of them and kept running, nearly tripping over his own laces several times as he made for the nearest exit. He'd leave that part out had he ever been pressed to tell this story.

What occurred on deck was nothing short of a scene from a movie, at least in Jake's mind. Here he was, the brave hero of his own tale, cornered by four larger opponents that stood between himself and freedom. The ladder down to the docks was on the opposite side of the ship; and even if he did manage to tackle another pair down, he had his doubts that he could run all the way around. From in between the men, the Captain appeared, frowning. "Didn't I tell you to stay off my ship?"

Jake swallowed hard, glancing back a second to make sure his things were secured to his back. It was time for one last show of insolence.

"Fr...Frankly, my good sir..." Jake steeled himself for what was to come, and with a resounding cry of "I DON'T GIVE A DAMN!" with what air was left in his lungs, lunged himself off the side of the ship and was gone with the wind.

... Or, he would have liked to have been, had gravity not demanded he hit the water first. Luckily, the blow was enough to release the catch on Beretta's Pokeball, the Squirtle giving a small cry of surprise and helped to keep her trainer above water he caught his breath. His bag was going to be a bit waterlogged later, but he was not one day into his adventure and he had already experienced a dramatic chase scene and quoted a quality film. He even still had both his boots!

This was, by any standard, bound to be marvelous, he could tell.

[Peregrine Mendicant]

wow ur gross leave us alone

accepted blah blah insert ramble here